Helloooooo!!! April!!!!! How you been? I feel like I haven’t seen you since like…wait when was it…Oh Snapple Caps…since like last year. I’m not sure if you remember buuuut you’re in SPRING BRUH!!! What do you think your doing being this freaking cold…relax your face and get your shit together, you’re embarrassing me. Any way back to what I really wanted to say. This month is known for the most glorious birth of all-time, and before you ask…no I’m not talking about the rebirth of Jesus Cristo, although that was pretty awesomeballz if you ask me. So this is where I make believe I was asked “but whom could you possibly be talking about Emily?” I’ll tell you who…HELLO WORLD!!! It t’was me!!! I, Princess Amelia, was born on post 4/20 (shout out to all you pot heads out there. You smoke that good shite…don’t you judge my spelling that’s how the British spell it… I think) meaning April 21st is my BDAY!!!! YASSSSSSS!!!! I will be celebrating my 4th anniversary of being 21 (*cough, 25, cough*…shut up Delilah you freaking whore) GOSH…that Delilah is such a bitch. So basically this was my subtle way of letting those of you…mother, father and brother dearest I hope your reading this, I expect something super duper extravagant that I make others Peanut Butter and Jealous of me (LOVE this saying… it’s from the movie The Interview… I say it as much as humanly possible).
Sooooo…. This is me changing the subject… Something has been racking up a pretty high tab at this place I like to call My Cranium Bar (I know you like my reference to alcohol…cuz I love me some VINO!!!). Any way as I was saying, I’m not the biggest fan of these new “slang” words. I didn’t know if it was because they’re the stupidest words I’ve ever heard, or because I didn’t know what they meant.
1st word is BAE, hate it and it sounds like the sound a sheep would make.
2nd THOT, my first reaction was, what the BLEEP is this nonsense, but after I looked it up, using my trusty Urban Dictionary, I fell IN LOVE with it…I think it’s HIGHlarious!!!
And the one that really bothers me is…FLEEK!!! This word literally means On Point, why do we need another word that means On Point, HELLO MOFOS!!! just freaking say ON POINT!!…Great!!! Now looked what I did…I just done pissed myself off. I’m done with this!! I say good day.
Love Ya from the moon and back,
Emily (I’m so mad I can’t even think straight)