My Wrists!!! Are You Forserious!

As you may know… if you don’t know now you know (thank you for that Mr. Biggie Smalls). Anywho, I’ve been on a diet for a little over a month now, and I feel pretty good. I’ve lost some weight and that’s awesome but I haven’t really seen it when I look at myself. I’ve heard from my coworkers, my parents, my brother and a couple of my friends that they see it in my face and around my waist. Which is freaking great, at least someone is seeing progress. The other day I did notice alittle something something. You want to know where… I saw that my wrist looks thinner… WTF!!! My wrist! Like I really wanted to go that extra space on my watch! You know where I want to go that extra hole for on my freaking belt!!! Well I don’t wear belts but you get my drift.

Why is it when you start to lose weight, the weight comes off in the most ridiculous areas!! Like I’m ok with fat wrist! I don’t wear bracelets or even fancy watches. I have a freaking Fitbit. Why can’t the weight come if in significant places. I would really appreciate it when my boobs start to look smaller and my chichos (means love handles in le Spanish) start to shrink. I know weight loss is a long and strenuous process, but come on, my fucking WRISTS!!

Well that’s all the rant I have in me… my energy levels aren’t the same since I’ve been starving myself for my wrists to look better.
Love Ya from the Moon and Back,
Emily (my boney ass wrist and I need our beauty sleep.)

Back At It Again…With the Diets!

A couple of weeks ago I wrote about seeking different weight loss options, and how I was leaning towards getting weight loss surgery. Welp! that didn’t go as planned. Apparently my insurance sucks big walrus balls. When I found that out I might’ve been…. OKAY… OKAY! I was extremely upset and I basically was like “fuck this shit, imma do me!”. So basically I gave up, and my thought pattern was not good. I was in a bad place for a while. I still attempted to save face and show Momma Moon that I was still trying to find ways to get this surgery, but I was over it!

Alas, two weeks ago some inspiration came to me! I didn’t have some big “come to jesus” moment or anything. The reason I decided to continue on this weight loss journey might not even be conventional, but I’m pretty out there and I don’t do conventional. “What are you doing now to lose weight?” you ask (even though I know that’s not the question you were asking, BUT it’s the one I want to answer this one first!). I signed up for Weight Watchers, and I have a feeling that it might actually work for me this time around. I know that Weight Watchers definitely ( I literally just spent 5 mins trying to spell definitely correctly) works because a few of my friends are on it now or have been on it at some point, and they have lost weight and have kept it off. Anywho back to me!! I’ve decided that this diet is going to work for me this time because I have the motivation this time!

“What is motivating you this much Emily?” Well two weeks ago I went to a tattoo convention with Sluttie McSlutterson, and let me tell you I got the itch to get another tattoo!! Since that day I have found three tattoos that I want to get and the placement of two of these tats are in the mid section, and the third would be going down my spine… nah mean jelly bean.

So because of these three tattoos that I want to get I’ve decided that I need to lose the weight so that they look super magical!!! I can’t wait… I’m super excited about this, and I’m hoping that by my birthday in April that I can get at least one of the tats that will possibly be on the or around the mid-section.

Well that’s all I got for now.

Love Ya from the Moon and Back,

Emily (Future owner…are you an owner of a tattoo since technically you’re paying for it and it’s on your body, or are you like a work of art… any way future owner/work of art)

Diets I’ve Tried!

So this topic came about in a special way. I’m actually writing a paper for my class (which is actually due tonight at midnight and I haven’t even started it yet… *sigh* procrastination at its best). What I’m about to write about is what my paper will be about, so I figured no better time like the present than to bring this topic up! Tonight’s topic is about (drum roll please… tatatatatatata 🥁) weight loss…I know I already hate it BUT I must continue on!

I’ve struggled with my weight my whole LIFE!!! I’ve tried every diet under the sun. “Which diets have you tried Emily?” I’m glad you asked you nosey son of B🌙tch. I shall make a list for you and I shall name it The Diets I’ve Tried/Attempted:

1. Atkins: for those of you that don’t know the Atkins diet, it’s basically a protein based diet which means a lot of meats and no carbs. Well that’s how it was when I tried it (mind you it was some time when I was in high school so probably around the age of 14ish). I’m not sure what the diet entails now, but I’ve seen many improvements. The other day I saw some meal bars and frozen foods with Atkins all over it so I’m assuming it’s doing well.

2. “Low Carb”: this one had more carbs than the Atkins a little less protein and a very sad Emily. I shall move on.

3. Jenny Craig(just so you know Jenny Craig is one expensive lady… this b🌙tch high maintenance): I tried Jenny my senior year of high school, and to my surprise it worked for me for a while… I lost a little over 50 lbs or so on this diet and I felt great. With Jenny you have a meal plan prepared for you from your consultant (you buy these frozen meals from Jenny Craig or they have a JC cookbook that you can work with). So you meet with this person once a week or every two weeks depending on how far along in the process you are, and you weigh in and talk about what’s happened that week, why you might not have hit your weight loss goal for that week and where improvements can be made. This worked for me until I went away to college and no longer had the JC meals. And the freshman 15 (you know the weight you gain in your first year of college) well that turn to the freshman 50 because I gained all that weight right back and then some. I was so distraught and disappointed in myself that I kind of gave up at that point in my life.

4. Liquid Base: when I was 21/22 my dad and I went on a liquid diet (NO there wasn’t alcohol involved… you jerk I know what you were thinking… bunch of alcoholics). For breakfast we would have a smoothie, lunch would be a protein shake and my dad went with no dinner and I was like HELL NAW I’m drinking something for dinner. So I would have soup but only the broth. This went on for about a month. This did work for a little while, but then I was like yo I’m peeing every two seconds and I was always tired because I wasn’t getting enough nutrients and shit and I was miserable and moody and I hated myself. Also around this time I was also a vegetarian for about a year at this point. So what I’m trying to say is I wasn’t a happy camper.

5. Weight Watchers: I was about 23ish when I tried this one and it’s a similar concept as Jenny Craig, but less expensive.

6. Paleo Diet: did this for about 2 days and was like fuck this! I didn’t do enough research on this diet I just jumped into it. Not the smartest idea! 

My weight has fluctuated a lot throughout these diets and every diet ended the same well except that paleo one, I really had no clue what I was doing. With the other diets I would hit a plateau, and nothing happened throughout this time in these diets and I was always active. In high school I played sports all year round. When I was dorming in college and even when I was commuting I joined a volleyball and softball league. When I wasn’t playing sports I was working out. I was at a stand still and that’s when all the doubt and discouragement kicked in and I would slowly start eating my feelings. All the progress that was made would go to shit and I would be back where I started or even worse. It’s a horrible cycle to put your body and mind through. 

This past week I’ve taken new strides on this weight loss journey of mine. I attended a weight loss surgery seminar, and made an appointment to see the doctor who held the seminar. This is a pretty huge step for me. I’d thought of getting weight loss surgery for a long time. It was a couple of years ago, but that story is for another time (maybe it’ll be my first episode on the podcast that I’ve been wanting to start… if I get there I’ll let you know). When it came to weight loss surgery I NEVER wanted to do it! I told my self over and over that I can get myself there without having to get surgery. I wanted to do this strictly with just diet and exercise. But sometimes it doesn’t work out that way. I’ve tried for years (about 13 years to be exact) to live a healthier life and lose weight and most importantly keep the weight off. Nothing has worked for me and I’m not getting any younger. I’m getting closer and closer to that age where my mom started having kidney issues. 

Mother’s side of the family has Polycystic Kidney Disease and my mom and both her siblings have either done dialysis or in my mother’s case has had a kidney transplant. My fathers side of the family ain’t no picnic either. On his side I have diabetes and colon cancer to worry about. And I have ovary issues since I was 19 (I think I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, but I technically haven’t been diagnosed, but when you constantly be having cysts on your ovaries.. I feel like it’s a given). So I’m pretty much f🌙cked if I don’t get my shit together. With these diseases looming over my head I have to act now while I’m still young and relatively healthy to make sure I stay that way. When you’re younger you don’t think about these things, but now that I’m older and I can really see and understand the toll these diseases take on your body… I don’t want any part of that. If having this weight loss surgery and using it as a tool (I learned this phrase from the seminar… I’m such a good student) to better my health and possibly decrease the risks of me inheriting any of the medical issues, I have to continue on this path that I’ve started. I’m extremely scared and nervous, but after seeing first hand the successes in my friends weight loss surgery journeys… I’m also looking forward to this next step in my own story.

That’s all for now!Love Ya from the Moon and Back,

Emily ( this one was a lot longer than I thought it would be… it should count for 2 Sunday’s… nah mean)

P.S: Life As A Moon has its own Instagram. For updates on the blog and hopefully the podcast and just some random stuff I post on there follow me @lifeasamoon