Back At It Again…With the Diets!

A couple of weeks ago I wrote about seeking different weight loss options, and how I was leaning towards getting weight loss surgery. Welp! that didn’t go as planned. Apparently my insurance sucks big walrus balls. When I found that out I might’ve been…. OKAY… OKAY! I was extremely upset and I basically was like “fuck this shit, imma do me!”. So basically I gave up, and my thought pattern was not good. I was in a bad place for a while. I still attempted to save face and show Momma Moon that I was still trying to find ways to get this surgery, but I was over it!

Alas, two weeks ago some inspiration came to me! I didn’t have some big “come to jesus” moment or anything. The reason I decided to continue on this weight loss journey might not even be conventional, but I’m pretty out there and I don’t do conventional. “What are you doing now to lose weight?” you ask (even though I know that’s not the question you were asking, BUT it’s the one I want to answer this one first!). I signed up for Weight Watchers, and I have a feeling that it might actually work for me this time around. I know that Weight Watchers definitely ( I literally just spent 5 mins trying to spell definitely correctly) works because a few of my friends are on it now or have been on it at some point, and they have lost weight and have kept it off. Anywho back to me!! I’ve decided that this diet is going to work for me this time because I have the motivation this time!

“What is motivating you this much Emily?” Well two weeks ago I went to a tattoo convention with Sluttie McSlutterson, and let me tell you I got the itch to get another tattoo!! Since that day I have found three tattoos that I want to get and the placement of two of these tats are in the mid section, and the third would be going down my spine… nah mean jelly bean.

So because of these three tattoos that I want to get I’ve decided that I need to lose the weight so that they look super magical!!! I can’t wait… I’m super excited about this, and I’m hoping that by my birthday in April that I can get at least one of the tats that will possibly be on the or around the mid-section.

Well that’s all I got for now.

Love Ya from the Moon and Back,

Emily (Future owner…are you an owner of a tattoo since technically you’re paying for it and it’s on your body, or are you like a work of art… any way future owner/work of art)

Vino Viernes!!!

IMG_0539Grrrrrr, ruff ruff…. Stop, Drop, Shut’em Down open up shop…OOOO NOOOO that’s how Ruff Ryders Roll (Thank You DMX and the Ruff Ryders for that amazing intro). For the past two days I’ve been feeling real Gangsta…nah mean!! Yesterday I was in the mood to listen to some Tupac Radio on iHeartRadio (which basically consists of obvisously the man Tupac, Snoop Dogg, Biggie, Dmx, Mobb Deep, Big Pun, and all that good stuff), and I haven’t stopped listening since. This morning the song by NWA, you know the one (F the police) came on and of course I drive right by a cop car. I felt like he/she heard it and was going to pull me over and I was freaking out, but then I looked in my rearview (like five exits later… because you know, I didn’t want to attract anymore attention to my self by constantly looking back and slowing done…I swear there was some logic in that) and when I glanced up that cop was no where to be found. Yasssss!!!!

On my way home I was feeling extremely proud of my self for escaping the cops (earlier in the morning) that I was about to go to a tattoo place and get THUG LIFE tattooed across my belly (I didn’t do it by the way… my mom doesn’t approve of the tattoos I have now imagine if I came home with that…my ass would’ve be kicked out). In the middle of my bars (I hear that’s what rappers call it) of Biggies Juicy, I started thinking…holy shit I was like younger than 10 when I first heard these songs and I was rapping along to them then like a boss. But then you think about the things these rappers were saying… scandalous, I feel like the Thug Life gods have just revoked my lifetime pass!!!

Okay on a completely different subject, WTF IS GOING ON WITH THIS KYLIE JENNER CHALLENGE!! Are these kids stupid!!!! What do these kids expect is going to happen by sucking their lips into these shot glasses or whatever the hell they’re using; that they’re going to get these B.E.A.UTIFUL full lips. NEWS FLASH MOFOS that is only attainable if you were either born with them or get some work done on them, nah mean jellybean. I swear these kids are freaking nuts these days…and I thought I was freaking crazy when I was younger. I just don’t understand why these teenagers are trying to emulate another person. Just be yourself and love what was given to you. LOVE YOURSELF PEOPLE!!

OM YEEZUS!! THIS VINO IS GETTING TO ME BRAH!!! I’ M A LITTLE LIGHT HEADED!!! I’m trying a new Vino for tonights occasion its Barefoot Shiraz. It’s not really my cup of tea, but I’m still drinking it because I can’t say no to Vino. It’s a drier wine than what I like, but I put some Sprite in that shit and made my self THE most DEEEELISH Red Wine Spritzer!!!

OOOO so I took another Facebook quiz yesterday. The quizzes name is Which Five-Letter word describes you perfectly? And apparently not only do my friends and family think I’m CRAZY but so does Facebook. I don’t know if I should be offimage1ended or… actually I’m okay with it. You, Facebook, you know me well!! On that note I say good day. This wine is about to have me laid out.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Love Ya from the Moon and back,

Emily (This post makes absolutely no sense and. I. LOVE IT!!!)

P.S. AVENGERS AGE OF ULTRON COMES OUT NEXT FRIDAY!!!! AHHHHH!!!!