Welcome and Good Evening, I have something really special prepared for you tonight! It’s going to tickle your pickle, it’s going be like the Goose that gets you feeling loose, it’s going dittle your skittle, it’s going to blah blah your blah blah… Sorry I ran out of random sayings. Anyway there’s really nothing special tonight I just wanted to get everyone hyped up. I’m sorry I did that I can be such an asshole. It might actually (must say with British accent) be Delilah (my alter ego) since its been a very long time since she came out to play. When she doesn’t get out much she starts to randomly seep into my everyday life, and that’s not good because this bitch is reckless. I find it so funny that my alter ego decided to name herself Delilah… Like why couldn’t she think of something more fun. Look at Beyoncé bro her alter egos name is Sasha Fierce… It’s amazing!! This is why Beyoncé is the Queen! My life goal is to one day be so incredibly famous that phones auto correct my name like they do with Beyoncé. I’ve spelled her name so many times that it’s started to look like it’s spelled incorrectly.Soooo tonight’s wine is Cabernet Sauvignon from Sweet Bitch! I’ve never had Cabernet Sauvignon before, but I just assumed that it was a dry wine! I feel like all wines that have a fancy name are dry… Clearly I know a lot about wines. Any way this wine was incredibly sweet. It was so sweet that it felt dry if that makes any type of sense. I love the sweeter wines but this shit was like have a shit of the sweetest syrup ( I can’t think of any syrup right now… I think I’m having a surfer overload). I had everybody in my house try this wine and everyone made the same face. Their faces was as if they had just bit into a slice of lemon! My parents were even saying that this wine could give you a good case of the diarrhea. If your into really sweet wines than this brand is for you because all the bottles I saw said a Smooth and Sweet.
Today my mother and I realized we can no longer go shopping together because we enable each other to buy random things we don’t need! Our original plan tonight was to go get dinner and then go buy another beach chair for this weekend. So after we went to dinner we stopped at Sam’s Club we ended up walking back out because they didn’t have anything. Next we went to Walmart ,which is right next to Sam’s, we walked around aimlessly until we came upon the beach chairs… I had to do some climbing but we found what we needed and we got the hell out of there because shit got crazy. You know if your in Walmart to long shit gets crazy!!!
While we were in Walmart I was telling my mom that I need to buy a suitcase for my trip to California next month, so she suggested we go to BJ’s. We went to BJ’s looked at the sit cases for like two seconds (because they were crazy expensive) and almost walked out with a supersize bag of peanut M&Ms, an oversized beach towel, some random tub mat and a new shower head for my bathroom ( that was like 50 bucks… I was willing to pay $50 for a shower head I don’t need instead of buying a suitcase I do need, I sometimes don’t understand my own logic) any way thank god those longs were long and we put everything back where we didn’t find them (sorry BJ’s workers, I know we’re such assholes).
Any-who after we leave BJ’s Mama Moon and I go to Burlington Coat Factory ( I don’t think that’s the name anymore, it might just be Burlington), so while we walk around there looking suitcases ( which were just as expensive as BJ’s) we find a section of paintings and photographs… So basically we walked out of Burlington without the suitcase, but I did get three new paintings for my room. I like to call it the Wino Wall!!Love Ya from the Moon and Back,
Emily ( the lady at the liquor store lied to me, she said the wine would be dry! How can I ever trust her again!)